Anxiety sucks. It feeds on itself, narrowing my world, driving my social circles smaller and smaller until it’s just me, work, and my beau. Those closest to me get this, and have put up with my fluctuations over the past decade. I haven’t been very good with my limits… and from an outside view it looks like I went from LIFE OF THE PARTY to pleasedon’tlookatme, ican’ttakethescrutiny.
This is why learning my limits and listening to what my body is telling me is a good thing. The swinging motion isn’t going to go away completely. It is a part of me to be madly social, and then need some alone time to process all I’ve taken in. But it’s nice that I am learning to ride the wave, floating down the river all Tao of Pooh like, instead of drowning as I fight the current.
So of course, now that I’m reaching some sort of parity, I have to go and stir up the waters again. Evidently it’s the learning to float that I love even more than the floating.
Time to return to LARPing. (Here’s an explanation for the uninitiated.) What better way to push my social limits and combine my love of crafting random things? I’ve been out of the game for… 5 years? So, to say I feel rusty is an understatement. But I can return to college after 13 years, I can totally do this.
I mean, I don’t get to wear elf ears for college.
I really do love the elf ears.
You can count on my next posts being about getting over my jitters, defining my character, and best of all… putting together my costume.
I promise to try not to wait 4 months between posts.